Masturbation

Cherry Blossom

Cherry Blossom

This was published in Rachel Kramer Bussell’s Women in Lust anthology. This erotic story of lesbian love was inspired by a recent trip to Japan. *  *  * I bumped into her in my ryokan in Kyoto. I smelled her exotic scent just milliseconds before my sleep-fogged brain registered the ledge I was supposed to step over in order to leave my suite, too late, of course. I fell to my knees like a penitent worshiper, one hand clutching the hem of her kimono, the other pressing down onto her foot. “Gomen nasai. Daijoubu desu ka?” I stammered. I’m sorry. Are you alright? My boyfriend had taught me that phrase early on in the trip, after he tired of apologizing on my behalf to all the people I bumped into. And I bumped into a lot of people as I was constantly staring upwards in astonishment at the cherry blossoms…

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Q: Is my fantasy unhealthy?

Q: Is my fantasy unhealthy?

I received an email from a listener today and I thought I’d share it because this gentleman isn’t as alone as he thinks and I see this as a great opportunity to address a topic that creates a lot of ambivalence and shame in people: The problem is I’ve become obsessed with the idea of ‘forced orgasm’ and rape and I dont know if I should hate myself for it.  I understand that such fantasies are acceptable in women because they are actually still in control so its not a breach of their consent.  But I wondered if it was ok for men to have these fantasies – given that from a male perspective, consent is imagined to be denied. Is it worse for men to have these fantasies than women? Should I try to focus on more healthy fantasies? My response to him was: This is a very controversial…

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Got Toys? Top 5 toys for women, men & couples

Collection of Silkenvoice's set toys

Silken on Sex #78: It is fair to say that I’m an enthusiastic masturbator and sex toy aficionado. My primary partner calls me his pervy dirty girl, and fortunately is not threatened by my self-pleasuring practices. He knows that my libido is off-the-charts and that it takes a herculean effort on anyone’s part (including my own) to keep me feeling satisfied for more than a few hours at a time. But he does try, and between his efforts and mine, we keep things very interesting. Which is where my chest full of sex toys comes in. I am grateful to be a woman, and grateful that so many people have put so much ingenuity and effort into accessorizing women’s pleasures.  Toys to fulfill our every pleasure, fantasy, and sexual need line the shelves of thousands of adult stores all over the world. And fortunately for men, I’ve noticed that the…

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Dirty Girl: The Preacher’s Kid

Dirty Girl: The Preacher’s Kid

(This is the complete text of the erotic story Dirty Girl: The Preacher’s Kid. If you haven’t listened to my podcasts of this story, Part One is here and Part Two is here.) Songs of Solomon 5:15 His legs are as pillars of marble, set upon sockets of fine gold; his countenance is as Lebanon, excellent as the cedars. She was a preacher’s kid, and like most preacher’s kids, she had a naughty streak, Rebecca did, only her parents didn’t know it. Most people didn’t. To all appearances she was a good Christian girl who did all the right things and never caused her parents a lick of trouble. But underneath the long tresses and proper dresses was the mind and body of a Dirty Girl. “I’m a Dirty Girl,” she’d sing to herself as she walked down Main Street toward the parsonage, nodding and smiling to all the ladies…

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Q: “You want sex? Now??”

Q: “You want sex? Now??”

The more stressed I am, the more I want sex. Want it to the point where I can find repeated statements in my journal to the effect that I felt I needed sex. Not comfort, not conversation, not food, not sleep. Sex. Which many people I know consider rather strange. “How can you want sex at a time like this?” is a question I was asked recently, and not for the first time. I’ve noticed a correlation between my drive for sex and my exposure to stress, especially that very un-sexy form of stress relating to death and dying. Given that in the past three years there have been five cancer diagnoses, two non-cancer related catastrophic illnesses, two deaths, and one impending death in my family, as well as my tendency to write down my thoughts and experiences, I’ve got a wealth of anecdotal material chronicling my responses to this…

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Libidinous Celibacy

Libidinous Celibacy

Silken on Sex #66: Celibacy has been in the news lately, and I don’t just mean the pious form of celibacy. I’m talking grown women and men choosing celibacy as a form of their sexual self-expression. Yes, that’s right: Celibacy is a form of sexual self-expression — it is possible to be celibate without being chaste. (Can you say masturbation boys and girls?) I am an advocate of the practice of libidinous celibacy. At first the juxtaposition of those two words would appear to be paradoxical, but I know from personal experience that such is not the case. A libidinous person may be someone who has lustful thoughts or is otherwise preoccupied with the drives of the libido…without necessarily acting upon them with a partner. Few adults can abstain from sexual intercourse (ie, be celibate) and not experience rising frustration at the sublimation of such a primitive and instinctual biological…

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When A Fetish Takes Over

When A Fetish Takes Over

Silken on Sex #61: In this episode, Silken answers a question from one of her listeners, Paul, who asked for help in dealing with a fetish that has taken over his sexuality, making it difficult for him to climax during sex with his wife. If you have questions for Kayar Silkenvoice, you can email ask@silkenvoice.com or send feedback to feedback@silkenvoice.com

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It is getting harder for me to cum. Help?

It is getting harder for me to cum. Help?

Q: Dear Silkenvoice: As I’ve gotten older my sexual needs have become more and more specific. I can only cum if the circumstances are just-so (I have a fetish). I can rarely cum when my wife and I have sex and she is taking it personally. Is there something wrong with me? What can I do? –Paul. PS: I love your voice. Do you do custom stories? A: Paul, I don’t think there is anything wrong with you. If you ever listen to Dan Savage, he cautions against what he calls the “death grip” during masturbation. He speaks to the vanilla community for the most part, but his words are applicable to practitioners of kinky/fetish sexuality as well. What does be mean by “death grip” masturbation? Finding what works and never deviating from it. Males discover at rather young ages that if they touch themselves in a certain way, it…

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From my lips to your ears

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